Still Waiting

Sunday, July 15, 2007

i hate to keep saying this but....

i will not say this ANYMORE.

relationships btwn friends REQUIRE sacrifices, and if you can sacrifice so much for your classmates, your boyfriend and your family, bloody hell, why not us???

come on. who do you think we are? your hi and bye friends? or friends that can take all the nonsense of how you cant come for outing????? let me tell you this. in whatever you do, please do it wholeheartedly. if you truly feel that you've not been spending time with us, please push aside some time and spend with us. if you cant even spare such time for those friends that went thru your secondary school life, i guess u'll have to lose them in no time.

and that is what thats happening ALREADY, not just "NOW".

sorry to put this in a crude manner, but this is how i feel. i've been hating u, forgiving u after being cajoled by other friends into ur own reasons, and hate you again for being so...not going out with us, yet keep hanging our names by your mouth. its NO USE. im so fed up with you now, that i cant be bothered telling you on what went wrong. busi-ness is one thing, but sacrifice is ANOTHER. i've been busy with my work previously, with bf, with tuition, not too much with family though, but i noe i sacrifice for my friends. even though its just a chit chatting and playing cards session, i will try my best to meet them up, and of cos, sacrifice them at times if i really have to teach tuition and stuff. but still, if i ask my conscience whether i've really been trying my best and making effort for my friends and i's rlss, i will say YES straightly.

other friends can keep forgiving you, but you know me. im not a very good tempered person and i swear i've forgiven you many times! but at times, i just think that your reason is totally crap. nevermind. life goes on, you move on. sorry if i hurt you in anyway, but think. by rejecting our invitation to outings, are you not hurting us?

if by any chance that i know u're coming, i'll be very glad, they'll be very surprised. perhaps we are going on to the stage that with or without you, there's no difference. you saw this coming, but you know in your heart, you dont have the time to prevent this or cushion all these consequences.

its funny, how fast things changes. i still remember the times i shouted for your name whn i got feet cramps in tamp swimming pool during our beginning of JC1 life.

but now, i wun even think of asking you for a swim with me. cos i know 2 things will happen:
1) reject me cos u're always too busy and dun have time for us
2) even if you have time, we have nothing to talk abt at all.

i know by saying the 2 things above will hurt u so much that u will cry. but i guess its time to show you, what is deep in my heart all along but i've nv said them out cos im afraid it'll hurt u too much and i dun wan to hurt u, cos u're my best friend.

but now, are you? dont think so.

g6, g7, g7, g5.....

g4. will? will not? up to you. if you really want make a difference, we will accept. but we will see.

-when are you coming back? ;